Lists

15 Reasons Why I Hate Cats

Why do I dislike cats I hear you cry, well, here is a blog post all about it:

  1. Scary is not a strong enough adjective to describe the terrifying little creatures that crawl by my legs and make creepy “meow” sounds.
  2. I always have the feeling that they are going to suddenly jump on me. For example, I could be sitting in front of the television and then BOOM a cat flies across the room (like spiderman) onto my lap and it begins to violently scratch me. You know, like those videos on YouTube.
  3. They shed and I don’t think that I prepared for that. I mean, I don’t think that I would be mentally able to walk out of the house knowing that, along with all of my hairs, there are little ones sprawled across my legs and arms.
  4. I live next to a crazy cat lady who likes to feed hers at the table. With cutlery. *the mental image is strong.
  5. Cats smell. But to be fair I think everything does so I don’t think that this one really counts.
  6. My parents don’t like cats and I can’t make up my own opinions, so I guess I should just agree with them.
  7. I am allergic to them: they make my eyes go bloodshot, swell up and itch and when my eyes do weird things like that I generally can’t see; something which I don’t tend to enjoy. #darktimes
  8. When my dog sees cats she chases them, and most of the time she doesn’t come back. This leads me into a sweary frenzy which usually gets me into some kind sort of trouble as most of the time when I walk my dog there is at least one person who knows either me or my parents. Great.
  9. They always tresspass, it’s not acceptable. Someone call the Neighbourhood Watch!
  10. Cats also confuse me. Is a black cat good? Is it lucky or unlucky? I don’t know, and to be frank, I really don’t care.
  11. In my opinion, you can’t really get much out of cats. Fine, some of them look cute, but when you stroke them; show them love, they don’t give really give a toss. You may disagree…
  12. Similarly to no.11, they don’t really care. I swear cats rarely see their owners, they are too busy pooing in everyone’s gardens, freaking out pets (and people). Then they just wonder inside to receive their dinner, and leave again. So. Dull.
  13. There is a real stigma of having cats. If you are a single man you are labelled “odd” and if you are a single lady you are classed as a “cat lady”. These aren’t completely accurate, however from my experience they seem to be…
  14. Some of them are just unnecessarily bizarre looking. There is one type of cat, sphinx, that looks like it’s fur is inside out – not appealing to the eye.

15. Cats aren’t as cool as dogs *pretty much sums it up

 

Best wishes,

Sofia

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